Among the StarsAmong the Stars.
The world is dark and dreary,
The absence of all things cheery.
Reach for the moon, and fall among stars.
Long down and see all the tiny people and the little cars.
Life still goes on, even though things are not right.
The Moon is so big and the stars are so bright.
The emptiness of space, is not as good as it seems.
You are all alone, with no one to hear your screams.
I admire the beauty of the sky above,
But it's cold and lonely, absent of love.
Though I hate the pain and suffering the world does cause,
It has nothing on the loneliness I'd feel.
I think the world is fine, even if it isn't great.
There can be joy and so many things that people create.
But you'll find me among the stars.
Looking down and smiling at the tiny people and the little cars.
(March 15, 2014, 9:50 PM)I look out the window to try and ease the tension in the car,
And see the bright moon shinning, it's pale luminescent beauty very far.
My nose is cold and my eyes are brimmed with tears.
The sight of the moon, proves the coming of my fears.
I'm afraid of ending up alone,
The only one in a world I've never known.
I don't know how to swim,
And I'm afraid of the darkness.
The moon is reflecting my lost dreams
No one knows the content of my screams.
I'm not afraid of dying,
I do it everyday.
I'm not the kind of girl, who's last hope is to pray.
I haven't been to church, in God only knows when.
Yet I still don't know the point of what I was doing; even back then.
Each day I sit, silent.
Watching the pain turn to something violent.
No one throws a punch, but there is venom in their words.
Almost as evil as the cras of the raven bird.
Cras means tomorrow; if it ever comes.
But so far it seem like the day isn't even halfway done.
If I could make it end I would,
I know I'm not understood.
I'm afraid of darkness.
For as long as I could remember,
and even when I could forget.
The darkness always haunts me.
It's the demon I can't hide from
Like a game of seek and find that I can't win.
It's so hard to fight my demons from within.
I'm not so much afraid of darkness itself,
But the mystery and secrets that it holds.
The nightmares that are hiding; remained untold.
When darkness comes to greet me, I can't help but cringe.
My screams will rise,
As I face my demons from within.
It's a battle, and a game.
And it's driving me insane,
Because deep down I know I can't win.
As long as I knew the darkness is what drew,
me to run and hide.
I cannot run from what's inside.
From what is buried deep within my soul.
It's one malicious goal;
Is to make me one of them.
And when they come to knock,
I can't resist to let them in.
These scars are no ugly.
They define who I am.
Every scar has a story,
So listen if you can.
I'm good at hiding my sadness and my pain,
I can act like I'm a rainbow,
when I'm drowning in the rain.
I am like a ticking bomb,
My thoughts and unspoken emotions keep piling up.
I move through the world as a shell of a girl.
I constantly wonder How and Why ,
People cannot see a lonesome girl when she cries.
Do they see and not say anything,
or assume all is well?
If they had the chance, do you think that they would tell?
What's the cure for great sadness, when you're living through a hell?
Don't be fooled by appearance,
All is not what it seems.
In reality I am a sad little girl,
with crushed hopes and forgotten dreams.
Next time you see a scar anyplace,
You may be staring despair in the face.
The physical pain distracts from the mental turmoil.
Don't you dare judge a scarred boy or scarred girl.
The world has darkness, no matter how it seems.
So be considerate of those
The PastTHE PAST
I wish I could go back.
It's constantly on my mind;
even though I know it shouldn't be.
If I could change things I would;
So it could be you and me again.
Partners in crime, and friends to the end.
Is it my fault you left?
Could I have made a difference?
Would it have even mattered?
I know I shouldn't be dwelling on this,
But my heart is telling me something is amiss.
If I could take it back I would.
I would fix whatever I could,
So you wouldn't hate me anymore.
I'll be okay tomorrow;
If tomorrow ever truly comes.
Because I can't stand knowing our friendship is done.
Wake me up when it's all over.
When the pain has gone away.
Will it be any better when we are older?
I relive the memories all the time,
Because I am always reminded of the life I've left behind.
When you're young, you're immature,
but you see that which you lose sight for when you are older.
I wish I didn't already lose that innocence,
That I could still find beauty in pain.
I wish I could find a rainbow
Underlying feelingsUnderlying feelings
Although you may see me,
but don't know my name.
Don't judge a book by its cover,
For they are not all the same.
Some have tragedy,
more than you think possible.
And no matter they try, It cannot go away.
The pain is too much each and every day.
Just because you think you know someone,
doesn't mean you understand that which they feel.
There are more cracks then what is on the surface.
You can't possibly tell all the suffering someone holds.
They may seem whole,
but deep inside they're broken.
Not everyone gets help,
Because they don't think they can.
Just take it from any woman or man.
Someone else's words can only cut so deep.
Some people have believed what others say.
And think it is a good idea to waste their life away.
Think before you speak, others have feelings too.
And some people feel more than you.